Sunday, 24 June 2007

als on a bad month, and keeping going

in terms of writing, this has been a bad month.

i've managed a story a week for primaries, weird range of scores as well, totally not what i expected - some 80s and some (well, one) 110s.

all three of these stories have been forced out with a deadline looming, and in all three cases i thought they were awful.

i've managed a couple of poems as well, and i'm starting to enjoy the process of writing a poem. but again, i'm far from happy with the finished things. at thirty-six, i still don;t know how to write a poem like i didn;t know how to write a poem at sixteen.

subs are down too. i've managed three subs. that's poor. i had a target of ten, and i've got a target of twenty for the july blast. so three, that's just not going to cut it.

i had a hit early on this month, low level ezine. buoyed me up for a few days. it got published straight off, then i had a poem published in a small print mag, so again - a little feel good factor. but they're low level things. just enough to keep things ticking over, but nothing more than that.

also, i've got some stuff out there that i'm starting to fret about - waiting on the results, hoping for a biggish hit. i hate that. i want to just send stuff out and forget about it, let the hit be a surprise.

worst of all is the word count. i'm at less than 7000 for the month i think. rubbish.

so ,blah blah blah, the point of my miserable little rant is this:

keep going.

a bad month's a bad month, and I can feel sorry for myself all i want. but there's a blast coming up. i can either give up, or get my head down, squeeze out some words, get the juices going by DOING not by wondering why i'm uninspired.

managed a poem today. also, read quite a bit. critted three stories.

keeping going...

the story i forced out for primaries, which i came so close to not posting 'cos i thought it was so awful is actually not being totally trashed.

keeping going...

i've got almost twenty pieces floating around, subbed here and there, one of them is bound to hit.

keeping going...

i'm thinking about doing the 'page a day' thing on a novel, just to see.

keeping going...

so if there's anyone else reading this who's having a bad month writing wise, i sympathise, empathise.

but keep going.

a really bad month is the one where you stop writing for good.

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